Congratulations to Bayern. United looked every bit the complacent, lethargic side I was afraid they would be. I don’t mean to be reactionary, but I can’t believe a Fergie led team could perform so poorly for an entire half. How many times can you expect a team to run at you and create chances before they realize that they’re playing with more skill, grit, and determination? Apparently, enough times to fill a full 92 minutes. So now United will need a result at home to earn passage to the semi-finals. Prior to that, every one of them will need a boot up their ass. I’m going to go drink now. If you’re still suffering, then hopefully the Retro Live Blog is amusing enough to drown some of the sorrow. If not, then Jameson is always a good substitute. Read the rest of this entry » Who: Bayern Munich and Manchester United How They Got Here: Bayern Munich How They Got Here: Manchester United “Owen won’t play for the Reserves tonight,” said Fergie in an interview earlier today. “He’s going to be training with the first team and we’ll see where that takes him. We’re keen to get him back involved because he’s an experienced player and will be a valuable addition for us in the run-in, when having a strong, fit squad is vital.” For months on end, United fans were subject to statements of “three more weeks” and “he’ll be back soon.” Some even refused to discuss the man any more, and vented their frustration via blog post. And yet, last week the Canadian/German/English midfielder strapped on his protective brace and took the field with the reserves. The highlights weren’t anything special, but they went a long way towards giving United supporters new hope. Read the rest of this entry » Monaghan gives us a seven person list, featuring Joe Cole (Chelsea), David Silva (Valencia), Balazs Dzsudzsak (PSV Eindhoven), Franck Ribery (Munich), Arjen Robben (Munich), Juan Manuel Vargas (Fiorentina), and Angel Di Maria (Benfica). Some logical choices, some big names, and some unfinished talent in that list, and yet I’m not entirely convinced that any of them are the ideal choice. Read the rest of this entry » All too often, we’re content to write off the legends of the past in favor of the talents of the present. Yes, Lionel Messi is an amazing player. Yes, he scores some ridiculous goals. But aren’t we being a bit quick to argue that he belongs in the Pantheon of Pele and Maradona? I made the same point about Rooney in last week’s podcast. I’m very excited by his current ability and am consistently impressed by his form, but does he really deserve to be in the debate about best United forward ever? Maybe… but I would say not yet… Getting back to Sunday’s derby, I found my friend’s reasoning far too rooted in the present. Liverpool may be struggling, but they’re still fucking Liverpool! A team that makes every diehard United fan break out in rounds of “Build a Bonfire” and “You Are A Scouser.” A team that would do anything to stop us from breaking the titles record. A team that our captain once openly stated that he hated. How could anyone write them off as a middle of the pack team when they’re coming to Old Trafford? So, with that in mind, I wanted to take the opportunity to think back on some the great United-Liverpool Derbies of the years with a good old photo contest. Can you name the year and result of each of the following photos? Here’s a hint: they’re all happy memories. Read the rest of this entry » #1 – F*cking Torres! Highlight Highlights 1:29 – Torres knocks in the first goal, and the home fans are silent. Neville was clearly ball watching there, a mistake that the captain should still be kicking himself for. Not to worry though… he’ll have a chance to make up for it when United play Chelsea next season and Torres is wearing blue and comes on as a substitute in the 73rd minute. Read the rest of this entry » The draw for the remaining rounds will be held on Friday, March 19. According to my dear friend Wikipedia, “Unlike the round of 16, teams from the same group or country may be drawn together from the quarter-finals onwards.” So, with all seven teams available, the obvious question remains: who do you want the Red Devils to meet in the next round? Read the rest of this entry » As we’ve seen in nearly every media outlet on earth, Wayne Rooney is currently in the form of his life. He can apparently score goals with every part of his body and is nearing the Dinho-Jedi Level where he nets against Sunderland using only his mind. But the question remains: just how accurate is the Wazza? Well, to answer that question, all we need is YouTube and several Manchester United players (Neville, Giggs, Rooney, and Fletcher) competing inBetfair’s Crossbar Challenge. Challenge Number One: Crossbar Rooney doesn’t exactly impress, Fletcher appears to cheat, and Neville is entirely too happy to hit the bar once. That leaves Giggsy to carry the torch, and Anderson to awkwardly hug him at the end. This video is reason #43,506 why I love YouTube. How else would I know who wins at crossbar challenges? Bonus points if you can tell me who makes the grating noise every time Rooney kicks a ball… and who does the ridiculously goofy laugh at 1:02. Any ideas? Challenge Number Two: Groundskeeper Murder Rene Meulensteen: “Hey Joe! We’re doing a form of the Crossbar Challenge today.” The Daily Mail – In discussing United’s triumph, the Daily Mail made it clear that it was Dimitar Berbatov who felt Wayne Rooney was on top of the world. “But Rooney remains at the pinnacle of his powers, so much so that in the opinion of Berbatov he is now the best player in the world. It is hard to argue with the Bulgarian when Rooney displays such versatility as well as a devastating ability to destroy the opposition. Milan one day; Fulham the next.” A valid point to be sure, but perhaps not as poetic as the following paragraph. “But United were like a predator with its prey, playing with Fulham until they decided it was time to go in for the kill.” Telegraph - Not content to merely praise the England international, The Telegraph dedicated a solid four paragraphs to the rumors about Real Madrid wanting to sign Rooney. The article sites former President Ramon Calderon as saying, “It seems that it’s an obsession for the president to go for Rooney. I imagine Manchester United wouldn’t like to lose a player like him.” No shit Roman. Thanks Telegraph, for putting such a happy spin on things! Read the rest of this entry »
Disclaimer: I wrote all of this while watching the DVRed match between United and Munich. I couldn’t get away from work, so I was forced to shut off all methods of communication and wait for 5PM. A fat lot of good that decision did me, as I ended up sitting silently on the couch, fuming at the result I had just seen. Nothing like ending a long day at work with a crap performance to really make you happy about life.
Category: Manchester UnitedFC Bayern Munchen v Manchester United – Preview and Predictions
By: Taylor Rockwell | 
13 Comments
What: Champions League Quarterfinals – First Leg
Where: Munich, Germany
When: Tuesday, March 30th, 2010 – 19:45 (2:45 EST)
Why: Because I want to spend my entire morning avoiding work and watching the highlights from the 1999 Champions League Final as a way to mentally prepare for this match-up.
Munich were drawn into Group A with French Champions Bordeaux, Juventus (of Serie A fame), and Maccabi Haifa (the Champions of the Israeli Premier League). Munich’s Champions League campaign got off to a strong start, as the German side defeated Maccabi Haifa 3-0. However, Munich were held to a scoreless draw by Juve before suffering consecutive defeats to Bordeaux (1-2 away and 0-2 at home). Munich were in danger of elimination, but victories over Maccabi (1-0) and Juventus (4-1) saw them finish the group in second place with ten points. Munich drew Fioentina in the Round of 16, and managed a 2-1 victory in the home leg, and then advanced to the Quarterfinals on goal difference after losing 3-2 in Italy.
Manchester United finished top of Group B with 13 points. The English champions were drawn into a group with CSKA Moscow (Russia), VfL Wolfsburg (germany), and Besikatas (Turkey). The Red Devils had a relatively easy go of it, defeating Besiktas away, Wolfsburg at home and CSKA away. United then went through a semi-rough patch, as the Reds tied CSKA 3-3 at home and then lost to Besiktas at home. However, a Michael Owen hat trick on the final day saw United finish top of their group. The Red Devils then drew AC Milan in the Round of 16, and won the tie in convincing style (a 3-1 victory at the San Siro and a 4-0 win at Old Trafford). Read the rest of this entry » Category: Manchester UnitedA Hesitant Hargo Post… with Highlights
By: Taylor Rockwell | 4 Comments
Owen Hargreaves won’t be taking the field tonight when the Manchester United reserves once again take on the Burnley reserves. But this time, it’s not because of injury. Soccernetare reporting (and the official site are confirming) that Sir Alex Ferguson has pulled Hargreaves out of the reserve team so as to keep him training with the first team. Category: Manchester UnitedThe New Number Seven? Taylor Votes For A Turk
By: Taylor Rockwell | 6 Comments
I tend to ignore most of what Goal.com posts, but I did enjoy reading Matt Monaghan’s recent article discussing what player is most likely to take over Manchester United’s most famous number. The #7 jersey has been worn by the likes of George Best, Eric Cantona, David Beckham, and Slave. Currently occupied by Michael Owen, it seems likely that a new signing will don the kit next season. But just who should it be? Category: Manchester UnitedUnited v Liverpool – Photo Contest
By: Taylor Rockwell | 1 Comment
This weekend, I was discussing the then-upcoming match between United and Liverpool, and one of my pro-Manchester friends made the following statement: “Really, they’re just a mid-table team struggling to stay relevant. It’s not like we’re playing Chelsea or Arsenal.” While correct on the surface, such an argument demonstrates the modern media trend of emphasizing the present. Category: Manchester UnitedUnited 2 – Liverpool 1 : Match Highlights
By: Taylor Rockwell | 7 Comments
Disclaimer: I was traveling yesterday, and spent a tedious two hours in Washington traffic angrily staring at my girlfriend. So, I was limited to iPhone updates and cryptic text messages from friends when trying to stay updated on yesterday’s events at Old Trafford. Here’s a collection of gems from yesterday. See if you can guess when they came in and from whom (about 50% were from Pool fans and the rest were from United supporters).
#2 – Haha… Torres!
#3 – Dammit
#4 – Wow. Rooney. Too close.
#5 – Not a penalty. Such bullshit.
#6 – I love Torres for kicking the penalty spot.
#7 – I fucking hate Torres for kicking the penalty spot.
#8 – PARK!
#9 – FUCKING LIVERPOOL! GODDAMN IT! I HATE YOU!
:05 – Sir Alex Ferguson walking out with the Red Devil Mascot. Not quite sure what to make of that, other than that I enjoyed the image immensely. Category: Manchester UnitedRed Devils Offside – Episode 6 – Man Utd vs Liverpool Preview
By: Taylor Rockwell | 6 Comments
Apologies for the late post here, been a bit busy. Mostly watching basketball. But between games I managed to record a new Red Devils Offside podcast. My guests in the studio were Albert Ottati (a Liverpool fan) and Patrick Brigman (a diehard United / Kentucky / skipping work to record a podcast fan). The boys discuss this Sunday’s game vs Liverpool, the Wayne Rooney Factor, the overall championship Race, and whether or not Nani deserves to be feared. Click that play button below to unleash the mp3 goodness inside. Category: Manchester UnitedReader Poll: Who Do You Want In The Next Round?
By: Taylor Rockwell | 11 Comments
With this evening’s results in the books, the final eight teams in the UEFA Champions League are set. Joining Manchester United in the next round are Inter Milan, Arsenal, Bordeaux, Barcelona, Lyon, CSKA Moscow, and Bayern Munich. A big surprise (Lyon over Madrid), a semi-surprise (Inter over Chelsea), and then some fairly predictable results mean United could be facing some stiff opposition in the next round. Category: Manchester UnitedMan United Crossbar Challenge
By: Taylor Rockwell | 1 Comment
In the second video from the Carrington ground, United’s own Joe the Groundsman drives a golf cart back and forth as Rooney, Foster, and Welbeck attempt to knock a cone off the roof. That must have been a fun conversation for Joe when he turned up for work that morning.
Joe: “Sounds great. What do you need me to do? Shag balls? Laugh in the background?”
Rene Meulensteen: “Well, actually, you’re going to drive a gold cart back and forth while some of the lads rip shots at you. Here’s a tiny plastic helmet.”
Joe: “These are the same guys that can probably kill people with a direct shot to the head right?”
Rene Meulensteen: “Uh… I’ll have to check on that… Anyway, into the cart you go. Stop squirming.” Category: Manchester UnitedUnited 3 – Fulham 0: Belated Match Highlights and Hyperbole
By: Taylor Rockwell | Add Comments
When Wayne Rooney scored the go-ahead goal roughly 8 seconds into the second half of Sunday’s victory over Fulham, I figured there would be a decent amount of comments about how the young striker “simply can’t stop scoring.” When he got his second (thanks to some deft work from Dimitar Berbatov), I figured my computer would explode with hyperbole. The reaction in today’s papers wasn’t quite as hilarious as I was hoping for, but there were some decent bits certainly worth repeating… Category: Manchester United
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